A is for Anxiety: Thoughts About Having a Less Stressful School Year

No time to read? Listen instead!

Here, more than halfway through my summer vacation, I find myself scrolling through some of the tabs I have left open on my computer. I pause at one titled, “Ideas for Next Year.” I glance at what I have jotted–entries that read like ten-second sound bites–and remember dreaming about what I could do with these ideas when I “had more time.” I pause and wonder. Is this that moment?

As I think about this question, I feel my heartbeat quicken and notice a slight tightness in my chest. My first instinct is to say, “Don’t worry, it’s nothing serious,” but I pause because perhaps it is more serious than I realize. These “symptoms” are the same ones that steal half of every Sunday throughout the school year and now, they are threatening to commandeer what is left of my summer vacation.

These “symptoms” have a clinical name, of course. You probably know it–it is called anxiety. And anxiety is insidious–in addition to stealing our peace and joy when we have time off, it can leave us feeling overwhelmed, fatigued, and sometimes, physically ill. The bad news is that anxiety literally wears away our well-being. But, there is also good news: We don’t have to let it.

As the first post of the 2021-22 school year, I am sharing with you my commitment to reclaiming my life from anxiety. It is my hope that if you are one of the many who suffer alongside me, you will join me in this commitment. Just imagine schools where we weren’t all in the death grip of stress! Perhaps we’d skip down the halls, laugh more, judge less, and take more time to enjoy the beauty that is teaching and learning. Can you imagine this? This thought makes me giddy with excitement!

So…let’s just do this! Below is a list of some of the strategies I use to help bring myself back to center. I know there are tons of others and it is my hope that if you’ve tried other things that work well for you, you will share. Reducing anxiety is an important commitment and I know that if we band together to help each other, we can make the 21-22 school year the Year of Joy!

An Incomplete List of Strategies that Reduce Anxiety

Have To vs Get To
We all have a voice in our heads that narrates our lives. The one in mine is always listing the things that I “have to” do which can have a paralyzing effect on me. When this happens, I soften things by listing what I “get to” do. It’s funny how such a subtle shift in language can change how we feel about what needs to get done!

Third Person Self Talk
While on the subject of inner narrative, it is important to note that when we narrate our fears and anxieties using the “I” pronoun, we tend to be harsher than if we were, say, talking to our friend about the very same issues. For example, when back-to-school night is approaching, we might hear ourselves thinking things like, “I just know I’m going to choke the moment I open my mouth. I am so bad at public speaking!” This train of thought perpetuates anxiety by leading us deeper into the rabbit hole of fear: “I’m going to blow it. I just know I’m going to blow it!”

The good news for us is that we can distance ourselves from these fears by simply shifting our narrative from the first to the third person. Watch what happens when I change the language of this example: “Kim thinks that she is going to choke the moment she opens her mouth to talk. She thinks she’s bad at public speaking.” When I do this, I can hear the calming voice of my kindest friends. What would they say next?: “Don’t worry, Kim. You’ll do great.”

Breathe
Most of the people I know and talk to have a memory of being so scared as a child that they held their breath, convinced that if they dared exhale–even a little bit–whatever monster they were hiding from would see them and they’d be doomed for all eternity. Fast forward to adulthood and it seems that my monsters are still chasing me because I catch myself holding my breath–All. The. Time. My grown-up monster, of course, is whatever fear happens to be at the root of my anxiety. Lucky for me–and you–the antidote to holding our breath is letting it out. One of my favorite breathing techniques works like this: Inhale to a count of four, hold it for a count of seven, and slowly exhale to a count of eight. For me, this has an amazing calming effect, not to mention gives me the oxygen I need to think straight!

Notice and Name
Another strategy that I like to use right when I notice I am feeling anxious works like this: Sit or stand still and survey the area around you. As you look around, notice and name five things that you can see. Then, notice and name four things that you can touch. Next, notice and name three things that you can hear and two things you can smell. Bring it home by noticing and naming one thing that you can taste.

Doing this is very centering and helps us in our moments of overwhelm to know we are okay. I have found that this strategy not only works wonders for me, but can be great when we are working with students who may be feeling the wide range of emotions that come along with being a kid navigating things from playground disputes to bad grades.

Tapping
Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT)–also known as “tapping”–can be very calming and centering when anxiety runs high. This simple process begins by tapping on the side of the hand and saying (or thinking) a statement along the lines of “Even though I feel like I am going to choke the moment I get up to speak at back-to-school night, I love and accept myself.” Then, using your index and middle fingers, you continue by tapping on the following series of points on the body: between the eyes, on the temple, beneath the eye, beneath the nose, under the lips, beneath the collar bone, on the bra line beneath the arm, and finally, on the crown of the head. All the while, you are speaking your fears out loud which can serve as a release that allows space for more positive thoughts and emotions to flow into our consciousness. (If this interests you, I recommend www.thetappingsolution.com as a good source of information.)

I admit to feeling very skeptical when I started this. I felt weird when I did it and doubted how this could be helpful but as someone who stuck with it, I can attest that no other strategy that I do quiets my mind as effectively as this one!

As I mentioned, I know that this is a woefully incomplete list of strategies for reducing anxiety. However, I’m fearful that thinking too much about how to combat anxiety might create more anxiety of its own. (Wink, wink!) Please do share the things you do to minimize your stress and I promise that I will check back with you periodically to let you know how my efforts to claim 21-22 as The Year of Joy are going!

(As a side note, if joy and happiness interests you as much as it interests me, check out my friend Lisa’s Joy School. She teaches stuff like this and much, much more!)